Am I ready?

Being faithful to the things God has been doing in my life required me to take my attention off the things I use to long after (love and marriage) and just pursue the things of God. There seems to be a new season in my life now where I’m being required to learn to pursue God in the midst of a relationship that pleases Him. The only question I have is directed to myself. Am I ready? Am I consistent enough to keep a dynamic prayer life and bible study and still invest time in a relationship? Am I strong enough to continue to be who I know God has called me to be in the midst of my first attempt at a relationship that glorifies God? Am I able to withstand the stress and hardship that comes with putting someone else’s needs before my own?

I have no answers to any of those questions. I’m just trying to remain as prayerful as possible, paying attention to the signs of my maturity (or lack thereof) in Christ to handle a situation like this one. My prayer is that if for any reason, I am not ready, God will grant me the grace as He did two years ago, to recognize that His will is not being done and to step away. For now, I’m praying, seeking godly counsel and paying attention to the move of the Holy Spirit and to the kinds of fruit this situation is bearing in me. Keep me in your prayers. The last thing I want to do is serve my emotions rather than serving God.


Osama bin Laden’s death {Ezekiel 33:11}

When I heard about the death of Osama bin Laden, I felt a heaviness in my heart that I remember feeling when Saddam Hussein was executed. I wasn’t mourning his death as if he was a beloved man or even a good man but a part me just instantly felt that rejoicing about this man’s death would be completely offensive to God. I am convinced that God would rather that this man had repented and made peace with his Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ rather than dying with his atrocities and sins unforgiven. Even if we captured him alive and then the government decided to execute him, at least he had one last opportunity to repent. I pray that someone told him about Jesus while he was still alive. I saw a really good quote on one of my Facebook friends page that kind of expresses my feelings more eloquently.

‎”I will mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.” -Martin Luther King, Jr

The following verse immediately came to me as I was processing the fact that Osama had been killed.

Ezekiel 33:11 “Say to them: ‘As I live,’ says the Lord God, ‘I have no pleasure in the death of the wicked but that the wicked will turn from his way and live. Turn, turn from your evil ways! For why should you die, O house of Israel?”

I mourn for the lives that the man had a hand in killing and the loved ones that he’s devastated over the years, but I really, truly, honestly cannot bring myself to rejoice that someone is very likely spending their eternity in Hell. What I believe we are called to do is stand in the gap, in prayer, for our countries, fellow citizens and fellow men because this event will have an impact on the lives of others; there could be retaliation and we just have to continue to pray for wisdom for our leaders and safety for our citizens.